Self Esteem & The Life Leadership Paragon™
The “Life Leadership Paragon” focuses on three key areas of your life which lead to self completeness. These include self esteem, self responsibility, and respect for free will.
Just think about that for a minute…
What if there were just THREE areas of your life that you needed to focus on to be successful, and to achieve self completeness?
Can you imagine what it would be like to have NOTHING weighing you down? To have complete control and confidence over every part of your life?
The first part of the Life Leadership Paragon is self esteem…
Imagine a scale ranging from 1 to 10 with 10 being a very high self esteem, and 1 being a very low self esteem (what we call “them esteem*”).
A person with a high self esteem tends to love himself, and to trust in his decisions and abilities to a high degree. This is a very healthy position to be in because this person experiences a lot less stress in life by not worrying as much about what others think.
A person with “them esteem” tends to rely on the judgments and opinions of others more than his own judgments and opinions. This is extremely unhealthy and is the cause of much unhappiness. it is very stressful to constantly worry about what others think.
Life is the perfect game…
Another characteristic of someone with a high self esteem is the realization that he or she is perfect. In today’s society it is constantly pounded into our heads that “nobody is perfect”. What is really meant by that is that we all make mistakes. However, mistakes are all part of our perfection; it’s how we learn.
We imagine perfection to mean “no mistakes”, however, how interesting would life be if there were no problems? The truth is, we would be bored out of our minds; and with nothing to solve or resolve, there would be no game and no purpose to life. Nothing would be worth accomplishing if there was nothing to overcome along the way.
It is easy for most people to imagine that our creator is a “perfect” being. Therefore, why would a perfect being create anything other than perfection? The fact is, he did.
We learn by making mistakes, then figuring out solutions. Think about playing any game. Games consist of freedoms, barriers, and purposes. Take away any one of those three elements and you have no game worth playing.
Mistakes are part of the divine perfection in all of us. When you begin to think about life in that manner, it tends to make more sense. So…from now on, when someone asks if you are perfect, the answer should be “yes”.
The 2nd part of the Life Leadership Paragon is Self Responsibility
Responsibility relates to your ability to make decisions and act on them without depending on anyone else to give you direction. It also involves personal boundaries.
A person with high self esteem will tend toward taking pride and responsibility for his or her environment, body, mind, and personal belongings.
Many people tend to do things for others which they can and should do for themselves. While there is nothing wrong with helping another person, when it becomes an expected action, it becomes a boundary violation.
Feeling obligated to do something for another person which that person should and can do for themselves leaves you feeling violated, and that, is not a healthy state of mind for anyone.
One the other hand, expecting others to do things for you that you should and can do for yourself is also irresponsible, and a boundary violation of that person.
It is vital that you know what falls within your realm of responsibility, and take appropriate action to do those things without having to be told to do them by someone else.
Equally important is that you establish and maintain healthy boundaries for yourself, and expect others to respect them. Don’t be afraid to say “no” when appropriate (which is any time you feel like “no” is the answer you want to give).
We all know people who are irresponsible. It’s easy to spot. There are incomplete projects all around them. Their lives are messy and chaotic.
Self Esteem and Self Responsibility DEMAND Respect for Free Will
Each of us has been endowed with the blessing of “free will”. It is a universal law that extends throughout the universe. It is respected by our creator to the point where we can do anything we want without hindrance, and our creator will never interfere unless we directly ask for help.
It is important that all of us learn to respect the free will of others as well. People are going to do what they are going to do. They are going to act how they decide to act, and that’s just the way it is.
The only person who can change YOU is YOU. And…YOU do not have the ability to change any other person.
What happens when you try to change someones attitude or beliefs? You receive back flash! That back flash can get pretty extreme depending on the self esteem of the person’s free will that you are infringing upon.
You have the right to be you. Nobody has a right to change who you are without your permission…in fact…they can’t.
In just about every failed relationship, you will find a violation of free will. One partner is attempting to change the other person into what they prefer that person to be like. This NEVER works, and is a deal killer in any relationship.
Self Esteem, Self Responsibility, and Respect for Free Will add up to Self Completeness
The goal is to achieve a state of self completeness. Once you have mastered self esteem, self responsibility, and respect for free will, a deep comfort sets in automatically. We call this a sense of “self completeness”.
This is a state that is well worth working towards as it is vital to your success in any part of life. It is so basic to accomplishing your goals, and so powerful, that having just one of the three components out of whack is enough to cause a complete and utter stall in your forward progress and growth.
It’s amazing that even people who project themselves well as public figures can still have a very low regard for themselves. We see it every day. Actors and actresses dying from drug abuse or suicide. We ask ourselves, “why would this person be willing to sacrifice such a successful lifestyle”?
Simply put, many people are in the career they are in because they feel it will make someone ELSE happy, or make someone ELSE notice them. The craving of “celebrity” status is an insatiable desire that eventually causes the person to self destruct. This craving to be noticed will never be fulfilling. The ONLY way a person EVER feels self complete is by doing what THEY want, and only because THEY want to do it.
Them Esteem, in my professional opinion, is the cause of most suicides due to the constant effort it causes to monitor how everyone else feels about what you are doing; it eventually drives the person crazy. You can never be happy trying to satisfy the desires of others when it comes to your life.
There are many doctors, lawyers, actors, etc. who make a lot of money, yet they are very unhappy. When they come to me, I find rather consistently that they chose their profession because a mother, father, or other person in their life wanted them to be in that career.
Self Esteem is the Single Most Important Area to Focus On
In summary, without addressing self esteem, it is pointless to work on other areas of your life. Yes, it is that important! That is why self esteem is the first area I check with any of my clients. When I find any evidence of “them esteem”, I immediately begin the vital work of repairing and revitalizing the client’s self esteem.
For more information on how I can help you get your life under control and heading in the direction of your choice, please contact me at 971-333-1188.
The Quantum Life Repair program for Self Completeness is both powerful and life changing. You’ll love yourself for giving yourself this incredible gift, because you’ll find that accomplishing anything you set out to do becomes much easier, and this means eternal happiness.
NOTE: The “Life Leadership Paragon” and the concept of “them-esteem” were created and developed by Dr Doug Kelley, founder of the Institute of Metaphysical Humanistic Science at www.MetaphysicsInstitute.org and are used here with Dr Kelley’s permission.